| Of course, faith is a key, just as love is a key, as truth is a key | 63 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| he or she has complete faith or complete love. The lack is often hidden in the unconscious | 63 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| other human beings? There is someone I would love to know more about, I would love to | 63 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| would love to know more about, I would love to understand. Could the spirits see what is | 63 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| happy being, capable of giving freedom, happiness and love to others. For that is the way God | 63 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| would not be loved or approved of. Since love and approval are so necessary for you, you | 64 OUTER WILL AND INNER WILL -- MISCONCEPTION ABOUT SELFISHNESS |
| a reward, whether in the form of affection, love, approval, or to obligate others, or because you | 64 OUTER WILL AND INNER WILL -- MISCONCEPTION ABOUT SELFISHNESS |
| is not so much for wanting approval or love, but perhaps that I want to try a | 64 OUTER WILL AND INNER WILL -- MISCONCEPTION ABOUT SELFISHNESS |
| ANSWER: Perhaps you do not want approval or love so much, although you may not be fully | 64 OUTER WILL AND INNER WILL -- MISCONCEPTION ABOUT SELFISHNESS |
| to a greater, others to a lesser extent. Love, unselfishness, emotion, sympathy, affection and so on are | 65 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| forces. That takes effect. It is like your love touching the heart of another person. When you | 65 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| darkness, but at a later time. For the love and goodwill you generate by praying for another | 65 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| effect on your own soul by the unselfish love and well-wishing, by the constructive desires that have | 65 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| contact, quite apart from the obvious factor of love and the desire to be together again, contains | 65 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| best part of yourself, that which yearns to love and give, to feel and to sympathize, to | 65 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| you are bound to betray also those you love best. When you find this indirect betrayal toward | 65 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| are just as ashamed of their faculties of love, humility, generosity -- the very best they have | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| appears to reject it may have more real love for the child than the other parent. But | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| the soul. In the child's vaguely felt emotions, love and acceptance from this particular parent becomes the | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| most desirable aim, all the more so because love and acceptance to the degree that the child | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| it seems unattainable. The desired aim -- exclusive love and acceptance -- is confused with the parent | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| place of that which was originally desired: exclusive love, approval, and acceptance. A further result of this | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| I am unloving, I will be desirable, my love will be sought. Just as I do not | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| yearns. An individual's withdrawal from and refusal to love is often much less determined by the fear | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| human heart. You try to force yourself to love, while your natural desire coming from the higher | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| from the higher self and truly wanting to love is stopped because you are ashamed of it | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| feel guilty for not loving and ashamed to love. Consider also that the child feels deeply humiliated | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| child feels deeply humiliated when it yearns for love and affection but is rejected instead. In its | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| its unconscious mind the idea forms that to love is humiliating. Since the most desirable person for | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| desirable person for the child has withheld the love and the free giving of feelings, love must | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| the love and the free giving of feelings, love must be something shameful one has to hide | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| is weak, while the rejecter is strong. Therefore love becomes weakness, while aloofness is a sign of | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| the wrong conclusion is that it is not love that makes the giving parent weak, but other | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| other attributes. It may be a distortion of love that causes the weakness. Or, the capacity for | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| that causes the weakness. Or, the capacity for love is relatively real and other factors cause the | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| other factors cause the weakness and afflict the love capacity. On the other hand, the strong rejecter | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| of emulation, but certainly not the aloofness from love and the inhibition of displaying the best qualities | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| strong parent is the one who gives more love than the weaker parent who is under the | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| you because you prohibit the unfoldment of your love capacity. At the same time, you betray the | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| person who is ready to offer you genuine love and affection or friendship or help in some | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| you what you wish. It need not be love, it may be respect, admiration, acceptance. Then this | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| terms, is based on the following wrong conclusion: Love is weakness; withholding love and affection is strength | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| the following wrong conclusion: Love is weakness; withholding love and affection is strength. Since you do not | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| emotions where you ascribe weakness to acts of love and humility that are tendered in a healthy | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| right concepts, you will cease to fear that love is humiliating; that humility, generosity, affection, and a | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| am a very demonstrative person. I give my love fully and freely. In such a case, it | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| that wants to give the utmost and whose love may penetrate the many layers of error and | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| wall. A part of what you display as love and as giving yourself may not come out | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| retaining the original wrong conclusion: I must not love, I must not expose my real self, and | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| assume a veneer of outgoingness, expressing emotions and love that are not quite real. You still do | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| a subtle way, you dramatize yourself and your love all the more because you do not dare | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| life. It is most easily found in the love relationship between the sexes. You can see where | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| have a true concept of reality, you can love without fear, and therefore you live without sin | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| and leave you again with divine blessings, with love and strength, with all the help we can | 66 SHAME OF THE HIGHER SELF |
| you, my dearest ones, with our strength and love, with our warmth. I ask you to open | 67 QUESTION AND ANSWERS |
| Just as people often ignore the difference between love and sentimental weakness, love and masochistic dependency -- | 68 SUPPRESSION OF POSITIVE AND CREATIVE TENDENCIES - THOUGHT PROCESSES |
| ignore the difference between love and sentimental weakness, love and masochistic dependency -- and thus distance themselves | 68 SUPPRESSION OF POSITIVE AND CREATIVE TENDENCIES - THOUGHT PROCESSES |
| dependency -- and thus distance themselves from real love -- so do they ignore the difference between | 68 SUPPRESSION OF POSITIVE AND CREATIVE TENDENCIES - THOUGHT PROCESSES |
| leads to being creative. For the lack of love can lead to a paralysis of the soul's | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| first examine the reason. The child's desire for love is limitless, but it is made to feel | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| that such a desire for exclusive and limitless love is wrong; therefore it feels guilty about it | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| it. It is true that exclusive and limitless love is unrealistic, its desire immature. The wrong conclusion | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| of this lies in thinking that desire for love in itself is wrong. The right conclusion would | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| conclusion would be to feel, The type of love I wanted so far is wrong; it cannot | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| provided that I, on my part, learn to love in the right and mature way. So, the | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| and to fight for a substitute for the love you lack. The fight wears you out, and | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| spite of your shame about your yearning for love and your subsequent suppression of it, you cannot | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| which is responsible for your not getting the love that you yearn for. But you do not | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| the ultimate shame to you that you want love in the first place, and that you cannot | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| to discover the unconscious conviction that you desire love but are not loved in the manner and | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| very well how to distinguish between healthy, mature love and unhealthy, immature, dependent and weak love which | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| mature love and unhealthy, immature, dependent and weak love which is not real love in the way | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| dependent and weak love which is not real love in the way your soul yearns for it | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| you make it impossible to receive the mature love you yearn for by resorting to the false | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| be loved. You may not necessarily desire the love of the people you want to be approved | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| approved by; there may not be a specific love object in your life. But the desire to | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| diminishes, you prepare the way for real, mature love. Your maturing mind will make you understand that | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| make you understand that the only kind of love that is love is the kind that is | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| that the only kind of love that is love is the kind that is given to you | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| First you will allow other people to not love you if they so choose. That may make | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| Inwardly, you constantly want to force others to love you. The outer cover is the approval, but | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| last analysis you want to force people to love you. And forced love is no love. The | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| to force people to love you. And forced love is no love. The child in you does | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| to love you. And forced love is no love. The child in you does not see that | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| within yourself that says quite clearly, you must love me. Weaker persons with unhealthy motives of their | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| You can never experience the free gift of love as long as the forcing current operates undetected | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| let people free by permitting them not to love you, if they so choose. That does not | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| if someone then offers you his or her love freely. You will then understand that you had | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| chance of receiving the only true and valuable love that exists. Please, my friends, do not misunderstand | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| misunderstand. When I say you force others to love you, I do not refer to any conscious | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| may not approve of, but also not to love you. If you are conscious of your original | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| do you forfeit the free gift of real love -- and not because you are not good | 69 THE FOLLY OF WATCHING FOR RESULTS WHILE ON THE PATH; THE VALID DESIRE TO BE LOVED |
| last lecture, about the right way toward the love we all desire, you described the work process | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| the emotions substituted for the desire to receive love. These emotions will not disappear the moment you | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| with which you try to force others to love you -- mostly by trying to make an | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| who agree with you, who appreciate, admire or love you. In those who please you you see | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| subjective, you do not know the meaning of love. You do not respect the other person for | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| be loved, while you are unable to give love -- certainly not to the degree you desire | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| you desire to get it for yourself. Your love will function only if people do right by | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| inwardly unwilling to give them. You request unconditional love. You expect to be so well understood that | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| expect to be so well understood that people love you in spite of your shortcomings and various | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| Thus, it is necessary that you learn to love, for only then will your attitude affect others | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| in their loving you. In learning how to love, the first step is to eliminate your personal | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| first step is to eliminate your personal subjectivity. Love is objectivity, among many other things. Subjectivity is | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| among many other things. Subjectivity is self-centered, and love and self-centeredness cannot exist side by side. This | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| by side. This is an important aspect of love. You all know, love cannot be forced, but | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| an important aspect of love. You all know, love cannot be forced, but love will grow organically | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| You all know, love cannot be forced, but love will grow organically as you remove the obstacles | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| of the greatest blocks to giving and receiving love, especially so because it is submerged. No human | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| human being is ever completely capable of real love and real objectivity. But there are degrees. To | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| you approach objectivity and, thereby, the capacity to love. Your capacity to love, in turn, increases steadily | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| thereby, the capacity to love. Your capacity to love, in turn, increases steadily as your willingness to | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| in turn, increases steadily as your willingness to love increases. The willingness to love will increase proportionately | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| your willingness to love increases. The willingness to love will increase proportionately as you no longer dread | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| imagination. Because of this, you are unwilling to love. Therefore, your capacity to love is constantly diminished | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| are unwilling to love. Therefore, your capacity to love is constantly diminished and paralyzed. The capacity to | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| to hurt you is proof of your real love. But, in order to have an objective and | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| through the subtle current of forcing others to love you; 2) your subjective outlook, hidden in your | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| emotional reactions, that makes you unable to give love; 3) your world of illusion wherein you are | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| you can never receive the exclusive, unreasonable, one-sided love that the child in you requests. But as | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| slighted or rejected, you will become willing to love others, often by quietly withdrawing and simply respecting | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| is no need to be unwilling to give love. With this willingness, your capacity to love will | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| give love. With this willingness, your capacity to love will increase. You will show discrimination in the | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| You will show discrimination in the kind of love to give others, and you will be undisturbed | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| also in the realization that not all people love you to the degree and in the way | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| you would demand. When some people do not love you, or even disapprove of you, it will | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| You either withdraw completely from allowing yourself to love to your utmost capability, or you give your | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| to your utmost capability, or you give your love full force to those who may still be | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| of locking your heart in fear of giving love because of the hurt that may result. In | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| those who are unafraid of loving and receiving love in a mature fashion, you will have a | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| mature fashion, you will have a store of love in reserve. From those who are reluctant to | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| in reserve. From those who are reluctant to love because they are still living in this illusory | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| resentments. In its own fashion, this kind of love is as good and valuable as the former | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| mature person will distinguish between many kinds of love, because he or she is liberated from the | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| so. Just as you are ashamed to show love or devotion, you feel more secure to be | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| retire and leave you with blessings, with divine love for each one of you. May this blessing | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| one of you. May this blessing and this love strengthen you to meet life as fully as | 70 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| turn, depends on your capacity and willingness to love. The more you are afraid of love, unwilling | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| to love. The more you are afraid of love, unwilling and thus unable to love, the more | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| afraid of love, unwilling and thus unable to love, the more you live in unreality, or illusion | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| and how maturity depends on the ability to love. Therefore I shall try to explain this in | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| child in you, requests an unlimited amount of love and covers this desire with various other desires | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| of loving. The more you are afraid to love, the greater your desire to be loved becomes | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| emanate genuine warmth, who are outgoing and whose love can truly be felt, have less need to | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| other hand, people who withdraw in fear from love -- and therefore from life -- have a | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| otherwise. This does not mean that when you love, you should not desire to be loved. But | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| loving, is the idea, perhaps unconscious, that true love will forever be unreciprocated and that to prove | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| forever be unreciprocated and that to prove true love you must give up your personal integrity, your | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| illusory construction. Even if you actually obtain the love or admiration you wish, you fail to perceive | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| your emotions. True detachment means that life and love are no longer in danger, as personal slights | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| dissolve. If it is not approval but outright love you need, and this love is not forthcoming | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |