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 Self-hurt...................1
You will not give in an attitude of self-hurt, submission, and masochistic self-punishment, nor will you hold 74 CONFUSIONS AND HAZY MOTIVATIONS
 
 Self-hypnotic...............1
an illusion. Extended fasting, concentration exercises, chanting and self-hypnotic reiteration of meditational phrases can indeed produce results 215 PSYCHIC NUCLEAR POINTS CONTINUED -- PROCESS IN THE NOW
 
 Self-idealization...........2
you will continue to cultivate more separation, and self-idealization must be the consequence. Self-glorification and idealization seems 143 UNITY AND DUALITY
power cannot lead to unrealistic arrogance, specialness, and self-idealization when you are constantly dealing with your lower 182 PROCESS OF MEDITATION (MEDITATION FOR THREE VOICES: EGO, LOWER SELF, HIGHER SELF)
 
 Self-identification.........9
eventually discover this. Before I talk further about self-identification, I would like to describe a few symptoms 113 IDENTIFICATION WITH THE SELF
only to perpetuate the identification, and thereby prevent self-identification, the original purpose has been misconstrued. In this 113 IDENTIFICATION WITH THE SELF
be, if it serves as a substitute for self-identification, there is harm. The harm is not in 113 IDENTIFICATION WITH THE SELF
that comes to you at all times. 189. SELF-IDENTIFICATION DETERMINED THROUGH STAGES OF CONSCIOUSNESS Greetings and blessings 189 SELF-IDENTIFICATION DETERMINED THROUGH STAGES OF CONSCIOUSNESS
itself. It comes entirely out of the false self-identification mentioned above. If you believe you are your 189 SELF-IDENTIFICATION DETERMINED THROUGH STAGES OF CONSCIOUSNESS
lost in them, and therefore cannot attain proper self-identification. Although your desire to hide the destructive aspects 189 SELF-IDENTIFICATION DETERMINED THROUGH STAGES OF CONSCIOUSNESS
toward creating more joy and pleasure. The moment self-identification takes place, a deep and apparently bottomless terror 189 SELF-IDENTIFICATION DETERMINED THROUGH STAGES OF CONSCIOUSNESS
to a new goal. To whatever degree proper self-identification has not taken place, and you find yourself 189 SELF-IDENTIFICATION DETERMINED THROUGH STAGES OF CONSCIOUSNESS
life. 232. BEING VALUES VERSUS APPEARANCE VALUES -- SELF-IDENTIFICATION Greetings and divine blessings for all of you 232 BEING VALUES VERSUS APPEARANCE VALUES -- SELF-IDENTIFICATION
 
 Self-identity...............4
these questions -- with the deep problem of self-identity. It is a human distortion to identify with 189 SELF-IDENTIFICATION DETERMINED THROUGH STAGES OF CONSCIOUSNESS
continue to be blindly controlled by a false self-identity, or rather by its consequences. The I that 189 SELF-IDENTIFICATION DETERMINED THROUGH STAGES OF CONSCIOUSNESS
to blind involvement, giving up on finding true self-identity and settling blindly for a would-be existence, you 189 SELF-IDENTIFICATION DETERMINED THROUGH STAGES OF CONSCIOUSNESS
confusion only adds to your lack of true self-identity and to your despair about it. Appearance values 232 BEING VALUES VERSUS APPEARANCE VALUES -- SELF-IDENTIFICATION
 
 Self-illusions..............4
road, it is infinitely better to have no self-illusions than to create this unhealthy and sickly aura 14 THE HIGHER SELF, THE LOWER SELF, AND THE MASK
off your masks, you believe the pretexts and self-illusions, the voice of your lower self, because you 17 THE CALL -- DAILY REVIEW
to look at themselves in truth, to abandon self-illusions and delusions, cannot come to such a transition 161 UNCONSCIOUS NEGATIVITY ENDANGERS SURRENDER OF EGO TO INVOLUNTARY PROCESSES
the most difficult in every respect. To remove self-illusions seems at first insurmountably difficult, since all human 190 IMPORTANCE OF EXPERIENCING ALL FEELINGS, INCLUDING FEAR - DYNAMIC STATE OF LAZINESS
 
 Self-image..................120
in peace, be in God! 83. THE IDEALIZED SELF-IMAGE Greetings. God bless all of you, my dearest 83 THE IDEALIZED SELF-IMAGE
and death, is the creation of the idealized self-image as a universal pseudo-protection. They never realize that 83 THE IDEALIZED SELF-IMAGE
the creation and the function of the idealized self-image. I have occasionally used the term mask self 83 THE IDEALIZED SELF-IMAGE
to be something you are not. The idealized self-image is supposed to be a means of avoiding 83 THE IDEALIZED SELF-IMAGE
oneself are interconnected. The creation of the idealized self-image serves to supply the missing self-confidence and to 83 THE IDEALIZED SELF-IMAGE
the links between your unhappiness and your idealized self-image. You need to grasp the significance, the effects 83 THE IDEALIZED SELF-IMAGE
that follow in the wake of the idealized self-image and to fully recognize its existence, in the 83 THE IDEALIZED SELF-IMAGE
fact, you are desperately hiding it. The idealized self-image may assume many forms. It does not always 83 THE IDEALIZED SELF-IMAGE
recognized perfection. Oh yes, much of the idealized self-image dictates highly moral standards, making it all the 83 THE IDEALIZED SELF-IMAGE
more you try to identify with your idealized self-image, the harder the disillusionment whenever life brings you 83 THE IDEALIZED SELF-IMAGE
devious, subtle, unconscious ways in which this idealized self-image exists in your particular case. Ask yourself in 83 THE IDEALIZED SELF-IMAGE
standards that are then incorporated in the idealized self-image. As a child, the human being encounters disappointment 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
all of them when incorporated in the idealized self-image. The submissive type will have a harder time 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
painful, aside from being contradictory to the idealized self-image which recommends self-effacement as supreme virtue, it has 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
of the divine attribute of love. The idealized self-image of this type will have corresponding distortions as 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
as the other two types. This particular idealized self-image dictates standards of godlike independence and power. Believing 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
hypocritical the goody-goody type is. Since this idealized self-image demands such power and independence from feelings and 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
The inability of living up to the idealized self-image always has this effect. When one closely analyzes 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
one closely analyzes the demands of any idealized self-image, one finds that omnipotence is always contained in 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
nature, is a crass violation of their idealized self-image and brings on deep shame. Conversely, the submissive 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
impossible when the dictates of a person's idealized self-image simultaneously demand one to love and be loved 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
to be aggressive and often ruthless. An idealized self-image may therefore simultaneously demand of a person on 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
the standards and dictates of this particular idealized self-image. This will make him or her just as 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
these solutions will the tyranny of the idealized self-image manifest. All this has to be found in 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
to get rid of the life- prohibiting idealized self-image if you merely observe what is in you 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
will then find what impossible demands your idealized self-image makes on you. You will see that it 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
You will see that it is your idealized self-image, and not God, not life, not other people 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
friends, because after all, you established the idealized self-image, as I indicated in the previous lecture, because 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
shifted to a substitute. For instance, the idealized self-image may dictate to live up to something, or 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
if the tyranny and pride in your idealized self-image are weakened by this work. Proceed on this 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS
of them is the creation of the idealized self-image. Emotional insecurity, is experienced to some degree by 85 DISTORTIONS OF THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION
you have made in connection with your idealized self-image, you know that its nature is very proud 85 DISTORTIONS OF THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION
on, the precarious pseudo- safety of your idealized self-image. The healthy personality can take defeat. You all 85 DISTORTIONS OF THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION
for any semblance of defeat. As your idealized self-image weakens, you will no longer command yourself to 85 DISTORTIONS OF THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION
from being what you are. But the idealized self-image pretends. Often, the goodwill to superimpose ideal standards 85 DISTORTIONS OF THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION
battle against recognizing the falsity of the idealized self-image and the consequent reluctance to give it up 85 DISTORTIONS OF THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION
its voice. The compulsive pride of the idealized self-image exerts its rules, dictating to the personality to 85 DISTORTIONS OF THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION
I shall read it: We present our idealized self-image to ourselves, as well as to the world 85 DISTORTIONS OF THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION
you have to hold on to your idealized self-image for dear life because, after all, it was 85 DISTORTIONS OF THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION
of the far goal may enlarge the idealized self-image. So the near goal should be the next 85 DISTORTIONS OF THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION
life's difficulties. The various aspects of the idealized self-image we have discussed are unconscious attempts to cope 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT
over others, competitiveness, and excessive demands. The idealized self-image will be set up according to these tendencies 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT
not correspond to the dictates of their idealized self-image. When you find such a submissive attitude in 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT
will find the main components of your idealized self-image, comprising, perhaps, all three tendencies. Only after this 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT
a relatively well-integrated child, how does the idealized self-image manifest, as against the real self? Is there 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT
a human being is, the weaker the idealized self-image. It may then manifest only in the disturbed 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT
distortions and soul disturbances, everyone has an idealized self-image. The strength of obstructions determines the strength of 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT
of obstructions determines the strength of the idealized self-image and to that extent the child -- or 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT
is always a good indication of the idealized self-image and its pseudo-solutions. Fantasy stems from the predominant 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT
serve as additional material for search. The idealized self-image shows up in more than just fantasy. It 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT
verified only after extensive work. If the idealized self-image shows in the desire- life, it must also 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT
no need whatsoever to daydream about the idealized self-image. A very active fantasy life in which desires 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT
of an urgent need to become the idealized self-image. QUESTION: Isn't every child when it is born 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT
the exaggerated demands and standards of your idealized self-image. It would hinder you from accepting yourself as 87 THE NEXT PHASE ON THE PATH; QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
to reach the heavens clearly symbolize your idealized self-image? While you struggle within yourself, being at war 87 THE NEXT PHASE ON THE PATH; QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
motives. The same is true of the idealized self-image, which cannot succeed and is bound to crumble 87 THE NEXT PHASE ON THE PATH; QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
pretentious and ostentatious means than constructing the idealized self-image or the Tower of Babel. It is your 87 THE NEXT PHASE ON THE PATH; QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
the Tower of Babel. It is your idealized self-image, your Tower of Babel, that divides you within 87 THE NEXT PHASE ON THE PATH; QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
with your search for glory, with your idealized self-image, no matter how subtly or unobtrusively it may 87 THE NEXT PHASE ON THE PATH; QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
the relationships among the main image, the idealized self-image and the God-image, particularly in regard to prayer 87 THE NEXT PHASE ON THE PATH; QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
to the God-image determines the type of idealized self-image that you establish; this attitude represents your pseudo-solution 87 THE NEXT PHASE ON THE PATH; QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
turn, represents the predominant attribute of your idealized self-image. The establishment of the idealized self-image has a 87 THE NEXT PHASE ON THE PATH; QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
your idealized self-image. The establishment of the idealized self-image has a further purpose in connection with the 87 THE NEXT PHASE ON THE PATH; QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
the rigid standards and demands of the idealized self-image not only serve the purpose of coping with 87 THE NEXT PHASE ON THE PATH; QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
against. This holds true even if the idealized self-image is predominantly rebellious and antisocial, because the rebelling 87 THE NEXT PHASE ON THE PATH; QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
the God-image will subtly merge with the idealized self-image. You try to identify with what you fear 87 THE NEXT PHASE ON THE PATH; QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
whether you want to or not. The idealized self-image serves the additional purpose of easing the brunt 87 THE NEXT PHASE ON THE PATH; QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
basic helplessness links the God-image and the idealized self-image, creating the fundamental problem with its pseudo-solutions. The 87 THE NEXT PHASE ON THE PATH; QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
God-image, and that, in turn, creates the idealized self-image. QUESTION: How should I regard my guilt feelings 87 THE NEXT PHASE ON THE PATH; QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
caused by resistance to giving up the cherished self-image of the good person. The need for such 88 RELIGION: TRUE AND FALSE
out of the need to maintain your idealized self-image: This is the way I should be. Because 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION
should be. Because you cling to this idealized self-image, you cannot find your real self, and do 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION
pretense, of your false maturity, of your idealized self-image. And you tremble because you know it and 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION
the reality of yourself instead of your mistaken self-image, the strength of negative emotions will abate. Yes 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION
for not allowing you to be your idealized self-image, where you feel it prevents you from being 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION
already discussed this in connection with the idealized self-image, and with the excessive demands and expectations you 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS
The more demanding the standards of your idealized self-image, the more rigid your superstructure will be. But 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS
is then often projected on others. Your idealized self-image is created not only for winning love and 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS
leads to repression and therefore to a false self-image. It leads not only to self-deception, but to 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS
other hand, when the voice of the idealized self-image speaks, many of these negative feelings will be 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
you have heard the voice of the idealized self-image. The answer as to which of the two 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
indicates, on the one hand, a strong idealized self-image, that is, I must be perfect already. This 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
process, you have to review how the idealized self-image came into existence. The two kinds of needs 92 REPRESSED NEEDS - RELINQUISHING BLIND NEEDS - PRIMARY AND SECONDARY REACTIONS
the artificially created needs of the superimposed idealized self-image. Only as you learn to maturely go about 92 REPRESSED NEEDS - RELINQUISHING BLIND NEEDS - PRIMARY AND SECONDARY REACTIONS
together with all the traits of the idealized self-image, and the various pseudo-solutions. Only by courageously going 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES
way, whatever the images are, whatever the idealized self-image is, and whatever the various pseudo-solutions are. Even 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES
one hand, and your moralizing tendency and idealized self-image on the other, make of the terms sin 94 SIN AND NEUROSIS -- UNIFYING THE INNER SPLIT
dealing with that topic and with the idealized self-image, you will understand what this means in terms 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF
single person. Everyone has pseudo-solutions and an idealized self-image. Both are based on a form of pretense 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION
picture, which might very well be your idealized self-image. QUESTION: Is a criminal, especially a habitual one 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION
extent. Wherever you have found your great idealized self-image, with all its tyrannical demands upon you, with 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS
drives. These drives are connected with your idealized self-image, your self-glorification, your feelings of inadequacy and your 98 WISHFUL DAYDREAMS
your lack of belief in yourself, your idealized self-image and your resort to pseudosolutions. These shortcomings create 98 WISHFUL DAYDREAMS
various other aspects, are incorporated into your idealized self-image. Since the nature of the idealized self-image is 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS
idealized self-image. Since the nature of the idealized self-image is self-aggrandizement, it separates you from others. Since 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS
deeply ingrained in you and in your idealized self-image makes it impossible for you to accept yourself 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS
aware of the particular nature of your idealized self-image. You have some inkling in what way you 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS
all illusions, all measures to strengthen the idealized self-image. As I have said in this lecture, intellect 104 INTELLECT AND WILL AS TOOLS OR HINDRANCES OF SELF-REALIZATION
what you feel. It may contradict your idealized self-image. All this has to be found and deeply 110 HOPE AND FAITH AND OTHER KEY CONCEPTS DISCUSSED IN ANSWERS TO QUESTIONS
this work, our whole discovery of the idealized self-image is that, after all, it is simply the 110 HOPE AND FAITH AND OTHER KEY CONCEPTS DISCUSSED IN ANSWERS TO QUESTIONS
the conscious self. As you know, the idealized self-image denies all limitations. It pretends possessing all that 117 SHAME: A LEGACY OF CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES, EVEN FAVORABLE ONES
consideration of the exact opposite of the idealized self-image should now be taken into this work by 117 SHAME: A LEGACY OF CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES, EVEN FAVORABLE ONES
images, main problems, unresolved conflicts, pseudo-solutions and idealized self-image. Look further into your personal displacements. How have 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION
progress on this path, your pseudo-solutions, your idealized self-image, your defense mechanisms have given you some measure 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION
a considerable extent the pseudo- solutions, the idealized self-image, the defense mechanisms, but the original problem may 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION
work you have found and dissolved the idealized self-image, the pseudo-solutions, etc. Hence, the small, precarious success 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION
not be flattering or compatible with your idealized self-image. Even if your finding proves not to be 123 LIBERATION AND PEACE BY OVERCOMING FEAR OF THE UNKNOWN
These are the pseudo-solutions, connected with the idealized self-image. With these the person hopes to defend against 125 TRANSITION FROM THE NO-CURRENT TO THE YES-CURRENT
it is not. It explains why your idealized self-image is so destructive. You feel more confident when 143 UNITY AND DUALITY
that. Some find certain facets of their idealized self-image, for example, and content themselves with that, not 147 THE NATURE OF LIFE AND HUMAN NATURE
wish to admit something so contrary to your self-image. The destructiveness causes fear and insecurity because you 161 UNCONSCIOUS NEGATIVITY ENDANGERS SURRENDER OF EGO TO INVOLUNTARY PROCESSES
and therefore apparently incapable of, shedding your idealized self-image, if you insist on living up to its 166 PERCEIVING, REACTING, EXPRESSING
to admit this in order to protect your self-image, others will reflect this negativity. Your reaction to 166 PERCEIVING, REACTING, EXPRESSING
ego becomes almost convinced of being the idealized self-image. This surface conviction is constantly counteracted by the 182 PROCESS OF MEDITATION (MEDITATION FOR THREE VOICES: EGO, LOWER SELF, HIGHER SELF)
only superficially -- perhaps only revealing your idealized self-image which you think is the only acceptable part 185 MUTUALITY: A COSMIC PRINCIPLE AND LAW
facade for the world. It is the idealized self-image you want so much to be that you 193 RÉSUMÉ OF THE BASIC PRINCIPLES OF THE PATHWORK: ITS AIM AND PROCESS
have a very strong investment in their idealized self-image, which makes no room for this truth, will 202 PSYCHIC INTERACTION OF NEGATIVITY
involved in the dualistic struggle, defending their illusory self-image. They are therefore blind to the psychic reality 202 PSYCHIC INTERACTION OF NEGATIVITY
I will not shy away from destroying my self-image, my vanity, my pride. For the truth and 209 THE ROSCOE LECTURE: INSPIRATION FOR THE PATHWORK CENTER
specific events. The latter may contradict your idealized self-image, your moral standards, your overall personality, but the 253 CONTINUE YOUR STRUGGLE AND CEASE ALL STRUGGLE

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