| your capacity for emotional experience, and therefore cannot feel immediate pain, it is also true that you | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| your solution was to dull the capacity to feel in order to avoid pain. From that moment | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| experience. If and when you cannot help but feel, you are busy hiding such feelings from yourself | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| -- love, belonging, communication -- if you neither feel nor express the occasional glimpses of feelings that | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| it if you are unwilling and unable to feel as much as you are capable of feeling | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| example on the physical level: an infant will feel the strong urge to use its vocal cords | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| ceasing to use the muscles at all, to feel the child's emotions at all, with the rationalization | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| them and deceive yourself that you do not feel what you actually still feel. Since you dull | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| you do not feel what you actually still feel. Since you dull your capacity to feel, you | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| still feel. Since you dull your capacity to feel, you become unaware of what exists underneath. Then | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| thought that to be aware of what you feel and to give vent to it in action | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| necessary to express and talk about what you feel, at the right place, with the right people | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| yourself to be aware of what you really feel, and to express it when it is meaningful | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| may come the realization that you often actually feel very much the opposite of what you force | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| the opposite of what you force yourself to feel. As the first few tentative steps are taken | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| the direction of becoming aware of what you feel and expressing it in a direct way without | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| such as you never had before. You will feel the growing process at work, because you are | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| it harms you more to know what you feel and are than not to know is extremely | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| you love if you do not let yourself feel? How can you love and at the same | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| understood, mature, constructive feelings will evolve. You will feel warmth, compassion, and good involvement such as you | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| you never thought possible. You will no longer feel yourself isolated. You will begin to relate to | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| them with a helper present, we may not feel such emotions, while we strongly feel them at | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| may not feel such emotions, while we strongly feel them at other times. If one is on | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| place, it is important that you do not feel guilty about the existence of such emotions which | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| part with the illusion of yourself, you will feel much more at ease. You will become capable | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| you see this discrepancy, you will no longer feel threatened by the negative emotions. You will be | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| you to be your idealized self-image, where you feel it prevents you from being what you could | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| for not allowing you to be what you feel you could be if the world would let | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| then, perhaps in the next moment, you may feel hatred or resentment. The fact that you do | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| It is not true that if you occasionally feel hate, you never love, or that you do | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| you never love, or that you do not feel real love in other moments. Both are possible | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| important for people to understand why they occasionally feel hate, while also loving. The reason for such | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| does not annul your love, you will not feel guilty. You will know that you are hurt | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| mean it, but I also hate because I feel hurt. As you grow in the way of | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| negative emotions about which, consciously or unconsciously, you feel so guilty. Let me discuss three such conditions | 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS |
| perfect. It is another to forbid yourself to feel what you cannot help feeling at any given | 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS |
| losing faith in yourself. Many of you now feel so unhappy whenever an issue is foggy and | 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS |
| the second case, a little criticism makes you feel no good at all, at least in the | 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS |
| merely human. Thus approval and compliments make you feel that you are living up to your own | 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS |
| now calls for awareness of what you really feel, letting out your true emotions and reactions. Without | 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS |
| this point. Once that happens, once you can feel the emptiness caused by an unfulfilled need and | 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS |
| that when they are denied, they make you feel as if you were dying. Now let us | 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS |
| as a permanent state. In that case you feel that nothing good and favorable can ever be | 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS |
| good and favorable can ever be experienced. Children feel that any momentary situation is permanent. And your | 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS |
| your childish emotions, despite your intellectual understanding, still feel that way. You exaggerate the importance of your | 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS |
| do so only if you allow yourself to feel. As you learn to do so, you will | 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS |
| things. However, in an intuitive way you will feel a certain tolerance and lack of anxiety about | 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS |
| any immoral instinct, makes you hide it. You feel, I should not be like this, and whenever | 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS |
| you should rejoice about this self-recognition, rather than feel bad that you cannot accomplish what you want | 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| false values of the idealized self. QUESTION: I feel the emotions, and they are like a stone | 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| between the two is by the way you feel about them. There is a very distinct difference | 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| a clear decision without pressure which makes you feel thoroughly good, even if it does mean giving | 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| these negative feelings will be present. You will feel guilty about existing negative trends while still wanting | 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| wanting to have it your way. You will feel fear and anxiety at the thought that you | 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| out the right act, it will make you feel resentful, rather than at peace with yourself. At | 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| a forceful compulsive superstandard. QUESTION: Why do I feel so exhausted all the time? I have seen | 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| belief in the validity of your aims. You feel that just because you want it, it cannot | 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| to adhere to a dead ruling. Then they feel good about doing the right thing. Truth is | 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| kinds of conscience, you should examine what you feel about this peace. Account for the feeling. In | 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| or outer action? Does it mean you now feel that you do not have to do anything | 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| the pattern despite the given promise, you would feel angry at yourself and be discouraged. Or else | 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| You will not wish to do it, or feel it, or act by it. You will quite | 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| own progress with equanimity. You will no longer feel any frustration or unhappiness as a disaster. You | 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| who have all these weaknesses and faults. They feel themselves ostracized, different, separate -- and therefore it | 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| reaches consciousness, that there is no reason to feel contempt for one's healthy needs. You will see | 92 REPRESSED NEEDS - RELINQUISHING BLIND NEEDS - PRIMARY AND SECONDARY REACTIONS |
| about the process. When it comes, you will feel so right about it. There will be no | 92 REPRESSED NEEDS - RELINQUISHING BLIND NEEDS - PRIMARY AND SECONDARY REACTIONS |
| of giving up something precious. Neither will you feel especially virtuous. You will relinquish it in the | 92 REPRESSED NEEDS - RELINQUISHING BLIND NEEDS - PRIMARY AND SECONDARY REACTIONS |
| with the help of another person may indeed feel at a loss to understand even remotely what | 92 REPRESSED NEEDS - RELINQUISHING BLIND NEEDS - PRIMARY AND SECONDARY REACTIONS |
| not facing that thing in you which you feel destroys your whole structure. Once you do recognize | 92 REPRESSED NEEDS - RELINQUISHING BLIND NEEDS - PRIMARY AND SECONDARY REACTIONS |
| to be immature and unrealistic. But I can't feel different. It is impossible. ANSWER: In this case | 92 REPRESSED NEEDS - RELINQUISHING BLIND NEEDS - PRIMARY AND SECONDARY REACTIONS |
| climate that you yet have to come to feel. You have to recognize its presence in order | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| it does to you. You have to acutely feel it, almost as though it were a foreign | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| feels in you, what it makes you do, feel, think, and how it makes you react, and | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| the needs must be there even before you feel them. It will enable you to become aware | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| of them. In due time you will acutely feel the real, as well as the superimposed unreal | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| the superimposed unreal needs. Simultaneously, train yourself to feel your defensive wall. Observe it in action. Feel | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| feel your defensive wall. Observe it in action. Feel its existence. It is there, if only you | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| difference in your behavior and reaction when you feel the defensive wall in you, and when you | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| either pressing down or pushing out, you may feel as though you were falling into an abyss | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| you were falling into an abyss. You will feel yourself defenseless, while before your stronghold, your safe | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| I am frightened, and on the other I feel an inner peace. So I don't know what | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| So I don't know what to do. I feel both ways, often at the same time. I | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| up childhood. When this movement is predominant, you feel the peace you describe. On the other hand | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| spiritual laws, and yet be dishonest. You may feel divided about it, may have committed it out | 94 SIN AND NEUROSIS -- UNIFYING THE INNER SPLIT |
| is right by all known standards. Yet you feel confused and anxious. The opposite course is clearly | 94 SIN AND NEUROSIS -- UNIFYING THE INNER SPLIT |
| be right and the other wrong, while you feel that both are wrong as far as your | 94 SIN AND NEUROSIS -- UNIFYING THE INNER SPLIT |
| One alternative may seem outwardly right, but may feel wrong, or neither alternative may satisfy anyone. You | 94 SIN AND NEUROSIS -- UNIFYING THE INNER SPLIT |
| wrong, or neither alternative may satisfy anyone. You feel helpless, and because you cannot cope with the | 94 SIN AND NEUROSIS -- UNIFYING THE INNER SPLIT |
| longer aware of the real reason why you feel so unhappy. Before you choose, you may go | 94 SIN AND NEUROSIS -- UNIFYING THE INNER SPLIT |
| selfish emotion. The way to determine whether you feel compassion or pity is to notice whether the | 94 SIN AND NEUROSIS -- UNIFYING THE INNER SPLIT |
| confusion? What do you repress? Compassion makes you feel and understand, but it is strong enough not | 94 SIN AND NEUROSIS -- UNIFYING THE INNER SPLIT |
| the confusion is cleared up, you will already feel a liberation, because you are then fully aware | 94 SIN AND NEUROSIS -- UNIFYING THE INNER SPLIT |
| that, and in spite of knowing it, I feel guilty. ANSWER: Your guilt, my dear, has nothing | 94 SIN AND NEUROSIS -- UNIFYING THE INNER SPLIT |
| QUESTION: It is more the loss that I feel than identification. ANSWER: It is also identification. Losing | 94 SIN AND NEUROSIS -- UNIFYING THE INNER SPLIT |
| defense is a general inner climate you can feel. Could you please explain what you mean by | 94 SIN AND NEUROSIS -- UNIFYING THE INNER SPLIT |
| whatever it is that comes to you. You feel attacked and threatened. The feeling in you, coming | 94 SIN AND NEUROSIS -- UNIFYING THE INNER SPLIT |
| a mental or intellectual consideration, but something I feel. ANSWER: In the first place, I do not | 94 SIN AND NEUROSIS -- UNIFYING THE INNER SPLIT |
| by determining in what areas of life you feel helpless, trapped in situations outside your control. Wherever | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| aim has to be fulfilled. If not, you feel weakened and humiliated. Since such fulfillment of every | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| and of others is so distorted that you feel any frustration as personal rejection and as proof | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| outside circumstances than you did before. You will feel less helpless as you become able to mobilize | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| two distortions. Other people will either make them feel worthless and dependent, or will inflate their egos | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| to do with feeling inferior. The more you feel worthless and as nothing in some hidden crevice | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| the point of view of how you truly feel yourself victimized, a prey to circumstances. Then observe | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| a prey to circumstances. Then observe how you feel frustrated when expressing your wants and your ideas | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| more or less powerful than you? When you feel dissatisfied with your life, ask yourself if this | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| are estranged from yourself. Otherwise, you would never feel dissatisfied with your life, regardless of temporary storms | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| hidden errors to light. Asking Why do I feel that way? will always yield results, if you | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| needs, physical and otherwise, but you do not feel any specific emotional needs. This unawareness does not | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| begins. You may do it, but you don't feel good about it. Although you know you are | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| yet in doing the right act you don't feel good either. Now, I heard you say that | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| take the form of finding why you cannot feel right about it. What stands in the way | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| subjected to the misery of life. If you feel impoverished, if your personality feels impoverished by such | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| self-facing, on giving account of what you really feel and why. QUESTION: I see. So, as long | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| tiredness and even apathy. This can make you feel angry and guilty about what you would commonly | 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION |
| you will not be lazy. You will not feel apathetic. You will not desire to remain idle | 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION |
| my real self, when and how do I feel that I have really fully contacted it? ANSWER | 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION |
| really fully contacted it? ANSWER: Before you can feel it, you will first become utterly aware of | 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION |
| that bothers you, determine whether or not you feel helpless. if you do, you now know from | 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION |
| experience you do find your real self. You feel a new strength. Does that answer your question | 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION |
| longer afraid. When I have that feeling, I feel hope. Now I don't have that feeling and | 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION |
| is part of the helpless baby that you feel you have to remain in order to be | 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION |
| concerned, what matters is what you want, think, feel, as well as how you experience others and | 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION |
| to yourself. Rather ask yourself: Why do I feel this way? Why do I want what I | 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION |
| of perception will understand and help and not feel superior. Sin and sickness are the same, but | 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION |
| the personal, subjective associations -- what you think, feel, and experience in connection with dream events. The | 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION |
| different with different people? I mean if you feel someone likes you then you're more relaxed, and | 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION |
| be more relaxed with someone for whom you feel no bond of affection than with someone with | 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION |
| of affection than with someone with whom you feel close. There are so many mutual undercurrents involved | 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION |
| and unhappy at times, but you will not feel insecure, victimized and uncertain about yourself. That is | 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION |
| others or yourself. Find in what respect you feel shortchanged. You resent that something in your life | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| a tendency to be discouraged or even to feel, What is the use? Why then should I | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| so often hindered by the either/or attitude. They feel either that they must strive for immediate perfection | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| productive approach is to make conscious what you feel, desire, fear, and then to find your own | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| discussed earlier. Full awareness of what you really feel and want is your first aim. Sit back | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| are illusions, and that you really do not feel that way at all, even though you are | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| fore and ask yourself pertinent questions. Dare to feel what you feel, regardless of right or wrong | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| yourself pertinent questions. Dare to feel what you feel, regardless of right or wrong, of what you | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| or wrong, of what you think you should feel, of what you think you are expected to | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| of what you think you are expected to feel, or, if you overdramatize, what you think another | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| you overdramatize, what you think another person should feel or do. For this is usually the main | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| which is connected with underplaying what you really feel, the outcome is obvious. Do concentrate on this | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| results. Ask yourself what you really and truly feel. Seeing it may sometimes not be so easy | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| common sense is telling you that you shouldn't feel this way. You understand with your mind that | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| step is the realization that you cannot yet feel differently. Here, perfectionism comes in, because something in | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| are in truth. But because somehow you all feel, I really should understand everyone, everyone else should | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| areas in which, emotionally if not intellectually, you feel you cannot admit certain things. What may appear | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |