| importance of what happens at this moment. The child does not see the passing character or overall | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| this slight or disappointment anymore. This is the child in you who reacts to the moment almost | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| of living in the now comes from the child in you that exaggerates the importance of the | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| a very good reason, my friends. Since the child in you is constantly clamoring for attention, it | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| moods and other negative aspects. Just observe the child in you working. You cannot force it away | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| gone according to your will; something that the child in you considers a disappointment. How then, does | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| be certain of yourself as long as the child is in you with all its selfishness, egocentricity | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| your lack of courage to help mature the child in you. To the degree you go through | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| so lose all the negative aspects of the child, you gain in stature, in certainty, in clear-cut | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| that for a long time the slowly growing child in you keeps producing hostility and aggressiveness, even | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| to limit such insight, you know that the child in you resists -- and you should know | 71 REALITY AND ILLUSION CONCENTRATION EXERCISES |
| is the result of the experience of the child in you. Realizing this will clarify in what | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| ability to love. We also discussed that the child in you requires an unlimited amount of love | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| you requires an unlimited amount of love. The child is as unreasonable, as void of understanding, as | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| why you are afraid of loving. Since the child in you desires complete surrender from others, being | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| help but resist total surrender of itself? The child in you makes you wish to reign supreme | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| all self-direction, and to be governed by the child in you who cries inwardly when its wish | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| the existence of the unfair demands of the child in you, you can reason with it. You | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| same time hide from it in fear. The child in you knows only extremes. It is either | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| you analyze these feelings and discover that the child in you is strongly at work, you will | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| to everyone, without exception. As long as the child in you persists in its strong, self-willed current | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| that this may not even be what the child who has built this unreal form wants. The | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| long as you deliberately remain blind, because the child in you thinks that by willing something you | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| full potential in you as long as the child in you is undetected and remains strong. Of | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| have the entire answer immediately; it is the child in you who cannot bear leaving anything open | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| be a privilege and a freedom, whereas the child in you rejects it as unknown danger. The | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| or fixed rule or law is for the child who cannot or dare not assume self-responsibility. The | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| is a form of immaturity. It is the child in you who wants everything, not only according | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| its own will, but also right now. The child cannot wait. As I explained last time, the | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| cannot wait. As I explained last time, the child lives only in the now, but in the | 72 THE FEAR OF LOVING |
| will remember that I frequently mentioned how the child desires to be loved exclusively and without limits | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| unrealistic. Yet it is also true that the child would be very satisfied with real mature love | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| earth is only present to a degree, the child will suffer from the shortcomings of even a | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| emotionally immature and cannot give the love the child craves, or give it only in insufficient measure | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| thereby exert a domineering authority by bullying the child, and not allowing its individuality to unfold. Both | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| parents, and their wrong attitudes, absorbed by the child, will cause hurt and unfulfillment. In children of | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| real warmth, unconsciously you knew it as a child and you resented it. Consciously you may not | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| aware of it at all, because, when a child, you really could not put your finger on | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| were not as faultless and perfect as the child thought and hoped, yet they are not to | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| subconscious, the following reactions take place: since the child in you cannot let go of the past | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| cannot forgive, cannot understand and accept, this very child in you always creates similar conditions, trying to | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| for the entire strategy is unfeasible. What the child in you sets out to accomplish cannot ever | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| that may have been when you were a child, is indeed the tragedy that your subconscious still | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| In not demanding to be loved as a child, you will be equally willing to love. However | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| will be equally willing to love. However, the child in you finds this impossible, no matter how | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| the longing and the hurt of the crying child you were once, even though you were also | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| must have hurt you when you were a child, but you may have forgotten this hurt on | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| the situation you could not master as a child. You will go on from where you are | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| needed to be loved when you were a child. First you become aware that this is what | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| of love. Since you are no longer a child, you will seek love in a different way | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| love and affection, all these trends of the child in you constantly provoke the other person and | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| injustice you direct at those around you. The child in you feels itself entirely different from others | 73 COMPULSION TO RECREATE AND OVERCOME CHILDHOOD HURTS |
| emotional reactions brought to light always show the child operating in you. And that child is self-centered | 74 CONFUSIONS AND HAZY MOTIVATIONS |
| show the child operating in you. And that child is self-centered and ignorant. Out of this self-centeredness | 74 CONFUSIONS AND HAZY MOTIVATIONS |
| unhealthy part in your being that speaks: the child in you who does not want to give | 74 CONFUSIONS AND HAZY MOTIVATIONS |
| its own life. By insisting that the inner child remain in this state -- no matter how | 74 CONFUSIONS AND HAZY MOTIVATIONS |
| an essential element of education for every growing child. It will be the basis of education. The | 74 CONFUSIONS AND HAZY MOTIVATIONS |
| to the success. You all know that the child in you wants something handed to it on | 75 THE GREAT TRANSITION IN HUMAN DEVELOPMENT FROM ISOLATION TO UNION |
| you accept all these conditions, but if the child in you does not, then fear of success | 75 THE GREAT TRANSITION IN HUMAN DEVELOPMENT FROM ISOLATION TO UNION |
| It all works as one. For instance, a child apparently inherits certain qualities from the parents, let | 76 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS (Compiled from Private Sessions and Earlier Lectures) |
| the saying of Jesus, Come as a little child? ANSWER: The childlike attitude that Jesus refers to | 76 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS (Compiled from Private Sessions and Earlier Lectures) |
| Prejudice is a wall of darkness, while a child is usually without prejudice, an unwritten page, at | 76 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS (Compiled from Private Sessions and Earlier Lectures) |
| how you have failed. Compare it with a child going to school, from one class to another | 76 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS (Compiled from Private Sessions and Earlier Lectures) |
| the perspective to scan the whole curriculum. The child learns its lessons day by day. But there | 76 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS (Compiled from Private Sessions and Earlier Lectures) |
| in general was more like that of a child. When you explain things to a child, you | 76 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS (Compiled from Private Sessions and Earlier Lectures) |
| a child. When you explain things to a child, you do it also more in a picture | 76 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS (Compiled from Private Sessions and Earlier Lectures) |
| a picture language, in simplified terms. When the child grows up, it becomes more intellectualized and more | 76 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS (Compiled from Private Sessions and Earlier Lectures) |
| you want to convey an idea to a child, if you want to tell a story to | 76 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS (Compiled from Private Sessions and Earlier Lectures) |
| you want to tell a story to a child, you do it through a picture book. The | 76 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS (Compiled from Private Sessions and Earlier Lectures) |
| factor. There is also a second aspect. The child in you imagines that you can only be | 77 SELF-CONFIDENCE: ITS TRUE ORIGIN AND WHAT PROHIBITS IT |
| are prohibited from pursuing a certain aim. The child in you thinks that this prevents your happiness | 77 SELF-CONFIDENCE: ITS TRUE ORIGIN AND WHAT PROHIBITS IT |
| from. Of course the answer is that the child in you believes that you will avoid the | 77 SELF-CONFIDENCE: ITS TRUE ORIGIN AND WHAT PROHIBITS IT |
| I mean the attitude of impatience. The inner child causes you to rush ahead, to think you | 79 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| erroneous and of limited logic, as the inner child always is. These motivations do not go to | 79 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| but in a very different way. With a child, so much is on the surface. The trained | 79 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| of forming, due to certain emotional distress. The child will then have to be guided and taught | 79 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| clung to since I was a very young child. I thought I really felt this emotion. But | 79 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| this longing comes from your unfulfillment as a child, now manifesting as exaggerated craving. You learn to | 81 CONFLICTS IN THE WORLD OF DUALITY |
| they do follow closely, even a very small child begins to make the connection and learns from | 81 CONFLICTS IN THE WORLD OF DUALITY |
| of avoiding unhappiness. Since unhappiness automatically robs the child of security, its self- confidence is diminished in | 83 THE IDEALIZED SELF-IMAGE |
| in this respect are more important. As a child, regardless of what your particular circumstances were, you | 83 THE IDEALIZED SELF-IMAGE |
| then incorporated in the idealized self-image. As a child, the human being encounters disappointment, helplessness, and rejection | 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS |
| life: that of being cared for as a child, not necessarily in financial matters but emotionally. So | 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS |
| protective love has a certain validity for the child, but if it is maintained into adulthood, this | 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS |
| of the other two attitudes. Here the growing child believes that the only way it can be | 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS |
| When, nevertheless, they come to the fore, the child feels deeply ashamed and considers any emotion as | 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS |
| friends, are there any questions? QUESTION: When a child forces love through a temper tantrum and as | 84 LOVE, POWER, SERENITY AS DIVINE ATTRIBUTES AND AS DISTORTIONS |
| dignity. This very attitude actually brings dignity. The child in you believes that the less defeat you | 85 DISTORTIONS OF THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION |
| is distorted, the following process occurs: The young child experiences insecurity, either from lack of love, from | 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT |
| personality of the parents. This creates anxiety. The child sense an atmosphere of danger. In that instant | 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT |
| this, the emotions you once felt as a child and, in a different way, still feel have | 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT |
| invulnerability, the underlying core may be the helpless child, looking for love and protection; craving pleasure and | 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT |
| is always a grasping at straws because the child, seeking solutions to cope with a seemingly hostile | 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT |
| yourself of them. QUESTION: In a relatively well-integrated child, how does the idealized self-image manifest, as against | 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT |
| the idealized self-image and to that extent the child -- or the adult, for that matter -- | 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT |
| to become the idealized self-image. QUESTION: Isn't every child when it is born as well adjusted as | 86 THE INSTINCTS OF SELF-PRESERVATION AND PROCREATION IN CONFLICT |
| in the face of a difficulty that the child finds impossible to cope with unless special defenses | 87 THE NEXT PHASE ON THE PATH; QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| and unhappiness. Here you are, the helpless, unloved child -- whether you actually were unloved, or felt | 87 THE NEXT PHASE ON THE PATH; QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| the unconscious desire to remain a clinging, protected child, to refuse the apparent hardship of adulthood, self-responsibility | 88 RELIGION: TRUE AND FALSE |
| hardship of adulthood, self-responsibility, and independence. To the child in you it seems much better to remain | 88 RELIGION: TRUE AND FALSE |
| of adulthood can be avoided by remaining a child, who at the same time refuses to face | 88 RELIGION: TRUE AND FALSE |
| rewarded with happiness for being an obedient little child. Since God does not reward such unhealthy attitudes | 88 RELIGION: TRUE AND FALSE |
| from the hidden striving to remain a helpless child in order to make the grown-up world -- | 88 RELIGION: TRUE AND FALSE |
| see the necessity of taking care of the child. And the child only deserves such benign care | 88 RELIGION: TRUE AND FALSE |
| of taking care of the child. And the child only deserves such benign care if it maintains | 88 RELIGION: TRUE AND FALSE |
| found this unconscious insistence on remaining a helpless child, you will soon come to see that it | 88 RELIGION: TRUE AND FALSE |
| that you are a neglected and unjustly treated child. True religion is spiritual and emotional maturity. God's | 88 RELIGION: TRUE AND FALSE |
| ANSWER: Yes, of course. But you see, my child, you cannot say, Now I will discard my | 88 RELIGION: TRUE AND FALSE |
| and with this defense mechanism at work the child in you hopes and fights for receiving what | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| You cannot have it both ways, though the child in you never wants to accept that. Since | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| and constructive or immature and destructive. As a child you possessed an immature body and mind and | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| you now. When you were hurt as a child, your reactions were anger, resentment, hate -- sometimes | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| conclusion. Immature emotions earned you punishment as a child; either they caused you actual pain, or produced | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| faith and emotional immaturity are mutually exclusive, my child. The ability to love is a direct outcome | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| a so-called temper tantrum takes place and the child in you lashes out, destroying others and the | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| out, destroying others and the self. Find the child who wants to strike out and you will | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| you will see the preposterous demands of the child in you. This is the work you have | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| when I say I love a person? (A child asked this question.) ANSWER: My little son, I | 89 EMOTIONAL GROWTH AND ITS FUNCTION |
| another act of not stealing? ANSWER: My dear child, if you would never in your life have | 90 MORALIZING -- DISPROPORTIONATE REACTIONS -- NEEDS |
| the thought that you act according to the child in you. This conflict will create more anxiety | 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| not accepting life as it really is. The child wants heaven on earth. It is true that | 91 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS |
| to find that you maintain it because the child in you believes it will provide you with | 92 REPRESSED NEEDS - RELINQUISHING BLIND NEEDS - PRIMARY AND SECONDARY REACTIONS |
| about, rather than feeling it only vaguely. The child in you resists growth, desires to remain immature | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| existence. The childhood hurts and frustrations, which every child experiences at least to some degree, cause unhappiness | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| The situation that brings this about leads the child to jump to the erroneous conclusion that every | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| abstract terms could. Let us suppose a male child has had a cruel mother, or maybe not | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| cruel, but it seemed that way to the child, because she might have been inhibited, undemonstrative, or | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| lacked understanding and imagination. In any case, the child experienced an acute lack of affection, warmth, and | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| rejecting, and do not give love. Therefore the child feels apprehension and anxiety toward women when he | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| concerned. She expected a high standard from the child. And when the child was actually successful, she | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| high standard from the child. And when the child was actually successful, she approved of him and | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| and was liberal with her praises. Thus, the child could experience some kind of gratification, provided he | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| even unconsciously. For in the unconscious of the child there is no clear-cut distinction between receiving love | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| him more of what he needed. As a child, he could not evaluate that his mother might | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| am I afraid of no longer being a child? The inner peace is the result of your | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| need for love has been denied as a child, and that he has gone on denying it | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| in its own way: one because the greedy child within you wants to grab, the other because | 94 SIN AND NEUROSIS -- UNIFYING THE INNER SPLIT |