| claim, which did not work. Look at the needs involved with this image. Once you recognize the | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| and unfulfilled claims, you will know that the needs must be there even before you feel them | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| the real, as well as the superimposed unreal needs. Simultaneously, train yourself to feel your defensive wall | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| the example of how to get the real needs fulfilled? ANSWER: Let us take the case I | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| going on, he will ask himself why he needs success so badly. The answer will be that | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| longer has to hold on to the false needs and the destructive defenses. But the change can | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| say, a person has a number of real needs, as everybody does, and a number of artificial | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| does, and a number of artificial, or false needs. They may not even be very strong. But | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| how you affect them, notice which of your needs are fulfilled and which remain unfulfilled. You will | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| we discussed. Become aware of your emotions, your needs, and your defenses -- how they make you | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| you. It will help you to relinquish false needs and replace them with constructive behavior patterns that | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| with constructive behavior patterns that fulfill your real needs. My dearest friends, may these words find an | 93 THE LINK BETWEEN THE MAIN IMAGE, REPRESSED NEEDS, AND DEFENSES |
| about to approach it. We recently discussed your needs. To begin with, you are not even aware | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| you are not even aware of any particular needs. Of course, in theory you know that everyone | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| course, in theory you know that everyone has needs, physical and otherwise, but you do not feel | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| but you do not feel any specific emotional needs. This unawareness does not apply only to a | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| of what you need. Becoming aware of your needs even superficially requires focused attention, considerable self-honesty, and | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| layers of awareness in order to find false needs before you find the real ones, isn't this | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| would be in absolute awareness of your real needs, whether or not they are fulfilled. As you | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| thus proceed, you become aware of your real needs. The real needs can also be subdivided. First | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| become aware of your real needs. The real needs can also be subdivided. First, you will become | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| makes it possible for you to fulfill these needs by something, however subtle, that is given to | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| subtle, that is given to you. All the needs I just cited can be real or false | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| and as long as you do not, your needs remain unfulfilled. The only difference between now and | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| that now you are acutely aware of the needs and the unfulfillment, while before you were befogged | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| different roots than the unfulfillment of the real needs, for the latter will never create anxiety and | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| will never create anxiety and urgency. Only real needs shifted into false ones have that power. Thus | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| that power. Thus being aware of your real needs, long before you can possibly fulfill them and | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| You run away from awareness of your real needs not only because facing unfulfillment is painful, but | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| determination, and the reality to face your real needs -- to receive and to give -- and | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| a certain period of conscious unfulfillment of real needs -- as opposed to previous unconscious unfulfillment of | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| as opposed to previous unconscious unfulfillment of real needs and conscious unfulfillment of false needs -- while | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| of real needs and conscious unfulfillment of false needs -- while you search and learn and gain | 95 SELF-ALIENATION AND THE WAY BACK TO THE REAL SELF |
| a disproportionate lag occurs, the resultant inner friction needs an outlet. Sometimes such outlets take the form | 96 QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS; COMMENTS ON LAZINESS AS SYMPTOM OF SELF-ALIENATION |
| The forcing current comes from your strong repressed needs, all the more forceful because you are unaware | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| with your genuine emotions. The urgency of unrecognized needs causes you to build up your emotions out | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| feelings, when they are not manipulated by unconscious needs, will create a very different inner situation and | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| wish to bend life, and others, to your needs. It is, in the true sense, a manipulation | 97 PERFECTIONISM OBSTRUCTS HAPPINESS -- MANIPULATION OF EMOTIONS |
| of wishful daydreaming is emotional and comes from needs instead of drives. Your repressed, unrecognized needs may | 98 WISHFUL DAYDREAMS |
| from needs instead of drives. Your repressed, unrecognized needs may create an even stronger force, just because | 98 WISHFUL DAYDREAMS |
| you are unwilling to leave your isolation, your needs cannot be fulfilled. As you know from previous | 98 WISHFUL DAYDREAMS |
| the subject, you either repress awareness of your needs or displace them onto superimposed needs that are | 98 WISHFUL DAYDREAMS |
| of your needs or displace them onto superimposed needs that are not genuine. This displacement creates confusion | 98 WISHFUL DAYDREAMS |
| produce fantasy fulfillments for both real and false needs. The more satisfying your fantasy fulfillment is, the | 98 WISHFUL DAYDREAMS |
| longer try to attain real satisfaction of your needs. The precarious pseudofulfillment is at least something, and | 98 WISHFUL DAYDREAMS |
| infinitely more satisfying than the daydreams, but one needs courage and flexibility; one has to give up | 98 WISHFUL DAYDREAMS |
| daydreaming of this kind encourages awareness of repressed needs. You will appreciate by now how important this | 98 WISHFUL DAYDREAMS |
| often you are only vaguely aware of your needs, or if you are conscious of them, you | 98 WISHFUL DAYDREAMS |
| evaluate them. You allow yourself to feel these needs only in your daydreams. The moment you step | 98 WISHFUL DAYDREAMS |
| to be by learning about yourself, your real needs, your drives, your pseudo-fulfillment in fantasies and about | 98 WISHFUL DAYDREAMS |
| QUESTION: What is the difference between drives and needs? ANSWER: A need is a very basic function | 98 WISHFUL DAYDREAMS |
| to pseudosolutions. These shortcomings create compulsive drives. The needs, on the other hand, may become unhealthy wants | 98 WISHFUL DAYDREAMS |
| will you become free and fulfill your personal needs. I have shown you many ways to unclog | 99 FALSIFIED IMPRESSIONS OF PARENTS: THEIR CAUSE AND CURE |
| special quality to give the child something it needs. Also, the child may have been born free | 99 FALSIFIED IMPRESSIONS OF PARENTS: THEIR CAUSE AND CURE |
| disadvantage because he fears losing the person he needs, whose love and protection he wants. So he | 99 FALSIFIED IMPRESSIONS OF PARENTS: THEIR CAUSE AND CURE |
| others, too, have their vulnerabilities and weaknesses and needs. You reject that part of their human nature | 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS |
| whose depths will make you aware of your needs. The primary result on this path is the | 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS |
| significance, you will realize that your present unfulfilled needs cause the pain. Your frustration will be with | 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS |
| previous lecture we discussed the subject of human needs. Before you uncover your various protective layers, you | 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS |
| cannot even be fully aware of your real needs. You may know some of your unreal, superimposed | 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS |
| You may know some of your unreal, superimposed needs, but only after a fuller understanding of yourself | 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS |
| you gradually become aware of the basic, naked needs that you have held in check. When you | 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS |
| so choose, to become precisely aware of these needs. This is inevitable if you wish to come | 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS |
| through the process of becoming aware of your needs and of the frustration of their unfulfillment, you | 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS |
| need to be loved just as the child needs to receive love and affection. However, it cannot | 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS |
| you actually experience the tremendous pressure of your needs. On the one hand, you face the need | 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS |
| varieties. You have to become aware that your needs are exactly both to give and to receive | 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS |
| to further your growth and strength until your needs can find partial fulfillment, and then little by | 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS |
| who waits helplessly for life to fulfill its needs without the necessity of self-involvement. The price you | 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS |
| the other person's humanity, of his or her needs, vulnerabilities, problems, and insecurity. In your demand to | 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS |
| give warmth, you never fulfill the other person's needs. When you are self-alienated and perfectionistic, you cannot | 100 MEETING THE PAIN OF DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS |
| are on the defensive you cannot fulfill the needs of others, not to speak of your own | 101 THE DEFENSE |
| covet may be a substitute for your real needs of which you may not be aware. Covetousness | 102 THE SEVEN CARDINAL SINS |
| degree that you become aware of your real needs, you automatically increase your maturity. When a need | 102 THE SEVEN CARDINAL SINS |
| two people recognize and express their own respective needs in such a way as to help each | 102 THE SEVEN CARDINAL SINS |
| here. If you are unaware of your original needs and therefore cannot go about fulfilling them through | 102 THE SEVEN CARDINAL SINS |
| themselves when they are unaware of their real needs and why these needs remain unfulfilled. As they | 102 THE SEVEN CARDINAL SINS |
| unaware of their real needs and why these needs remain unfulfilled. As they understand the reasons, thus | 102 THE SEVEN CARDINAL SINS |
| important. How could such a mature person who needs and wants to give love, who is able | 102 THE SEVEN CARDINAL SINS |
| love-capacity grows. Although this is not new, it needs to be repeated, for this knowledge is not | 103 HARM OF TOO MUCH LOVE GIVING -- CONSTRUCTIVE AND DESTRUCTIVE WILL FORCES |
| partnership relations or in personal friendships -- that needs and wants to possess can be as destructive | 103 HARM OF TOO MUCH LOVE GIVING -- CONSTRUCTIVE AND DESTRUCTIVE WILL FORCES |
| and be more finely attuned to the other's needs -- whether she or he wants to receive | 103 HARM OF TOO MUCH LOVE GIVING -- CONSTRUCTIVE AND DESTRUCTIVE WILL FORCES |
| increased self-awareness, your sensitivity to the other person's needs will develop. You will sense that it is | 103 HARM OF TOO MUCH LOVE GIVING -- CONSTRUCTIVE AND DESTRUCTIVE WILL FORCES |
| your own disturbing currents, as well as the needs and the will of the other, while remaining | 103 HARM OF TOO MUCH LOVE GIVING -- CONSTRUCTIVE AND DESTRUCTIVE WILL FORCES |
| you have learned, not only by your innermost needs. It is quite an important insight to determine | 103 HARM OF TOO MUCH LOVE GIVING -- CONSTRUCTIVE AND DESTRUCTIVE WILL FORCES |
| Would anyone justify what they do not feel needs justification? If you feel that what you do | 104 INTELLECT AND WILL AS TOOLS OR HINDRANCES OF SELF-REALIZATION |
| justification? If you feel that what you do needs justification, you must condemn, or judge, or moralize | 104 INTELLECT AND WILL AS TOOLS OR HINDRANCES OF SELF-REALIZATION |
| of view. Even though some of your genuine needs might not be met, you would see that | 104 INTELLECT AND WILL AS TOOLS OR HINDRANCES OF SELF-REALIZATION |
| lives unto the day, tending to his immediate needs. As yet the mind is not developed and | 105 HUMANITY'S RELATIONSHIP TO GOD IN VARIOUS STAGES OF DEVELOPMENT |
| he will first use it for his immediate needs that become more pressing in a growing civilization | 105 HUMANITY'S RELATIONSHIP TO GOD IN VARIOUS STAGES OF DEVELOPMENT |
| false. False, because it is based on personal needs, on wishful thinking, and on fear. The more | 105 HUMANITY'S RELATIONSHIP TO GOD IN VARIOUS STAGES OF DEVELOPMENT |
| of growth that cannot be hurried. Yet it needs encouragement and preparation. It needs help to direct | 105 HUMANITY'S RELATIONSHIP TO GOD IN VARIOUS STAGES OF DEVELOPMENT |
| hurried. Yet it needs encouragement and preparation. It needs help to direct attention to his resistances. QUESTION | 105 HUMANITY'S RELATIONSHIP TO GOD IN VARIOUS STAGES OF DEVELOPMENT |
| be emphasized enough. It is always forgotten, and needs constant reminding. This emotional experience, being in what | 105 HUMANITY'S RELATIONSHIP TO GOD IN VARIOUS STAGES OF DEVELOPMENT |
| focus on superficial actions and forget that one needs complete inner will to face everything within. To | 106 SADNESS VERSUS DEPRESSION -- RELATIONSHIP |
| What is so easily forgotten is that depression needs to be considered a problem in itself rather | 106 SADNESS VERSUS DEPRESSION -- RELATIONSHIP |
| to whom you can express your real sorrows, needs, worries, longings, wishes? Very few, if any. To | 106 SADNESS VERSUS DEPRESSION -- RELATIONSHIP |
| either react by giving in due to fears, needs, and dependency, and lose integrity, or will rebel | 106 SADNESS VERSUS DEPRESSION -- RELATIONSHIP |
| and affection and understanding, without your own urgent needs blurring the realistic perception of others. If you | 107 THREE ASPECTS THAT PREVENT LOVING |
| inner noise of fears, shames, defenses, and urgent needs and come directly to the well of calmness | 107 THREE ASPECTS THAT PREVENT LOVING |
| and in sensitive awareness of what the other needs and wants. Therefore the giving is not free | 107 THREE ASPECTS THAT PREVENT LOVING |
| at the other person and sensing the other's needs. The idea of being refused is devastating to | 107 THREE ASPECTS THAT PREVENT LOVING |
| Repeated unfulfillment hurts so much more than it needs to because of a childish inability to stand | 107 THREE ASPECTS THAT PREVENT LOVING |
| brought to awareness and faced. Sometimes, when the needs are fulfilled, the love wears off. This should | 107 THREE ASPECTS THAT PREVENT LOVING |
| people are as incapable of fulfilling other people's needs as those belonging to the other two types | 107 THREE ASPECTS THAT PREVENT LOVING |
| inner experience; false faith covers fear, insecurity, childish needs. In order to establish true faith all falsity | 110 HOPE AND FAITH AND OTHER KEY CONCEPTS DISCUSSED IN ANSWERS TO QUESTIONS |
| it, belittling them, shoving them aside, disregarding their needs, impairing their self-respect and dignity. All this may | 110 HOPE AND FAITH AND OTHER KEY CONCEPTS DISCUSSED IN ANSWERS TO QUESTIONS |
| be dependent on a number of circumstances. It needs a conglomeration of many conditions. That is why | 110 HOPE AND FAITH AND OTHER KEY CONCEPTS DISCUSSED IN ANSWERS TO QUESTIONS |
| any resistance. I said this before, but it needs repetition because you forget these things. My dearest | 110 HOPE AND FAITH AND OTHER KEY CONCEPTS DISCUSSED IN ANSWERS TO QUESTIONS |
| soul suffers more from an impression than it needs to and even favorable impressions cause exhaustion. You | 111 SOUL-SUBSTANCE -- COPING WITH DEMANDS |
| though you may never know it consciously. It needs the increased awareness that is cultivated on a | 111 SOUL-SUBSTANCE -- COPING WITH DEMANDS |
| of affairs is not natural or necessary hardly needs to be emphasized, once you see it clearly | 113 IDENTIFICATION WITH THE SELF |
| an excuse for depending upon others for one's needs. One does not want to give up the | 114 STRUGGLE: HEALTHY AND UNHEALTHY |
| in this respect. Depending on others for one's needs may take many forms and apply to many | 114 STRUGGLE: HEALTHY AND UNHEALTHY |
| child because then others are responsible for your needs, your happiness, and your safety. Again I have | 114 STRUGGLE: HEALTHY AND UNHEALTHY |
| taking the trouble of pondering what the other's needs are, or the effort to establish mutual understanding | 115 PERCEPTION, DETERMINATION, LOVE AS ASPECTS OF CONSCIOUSNESS |
| to do with genuine love but indicate immature needs and dependency and thus often bring rupture and | 115 PERCEPTION, DETERMINATION, LOVE AS ASPECTS OF CONSCIOUSNESS |
| flexibility of putting one's egocentric aims below the needs of the other person. To love God as | 115 PERCEPTION, DETERMINATION, LOVE AS ASPECTS OF CONSCIOUSNESS |
| area of close involvement he or she surely needs to learn. It may be true that people | 115 PERCEPTION, DETERMINATION, LOVE AS ASPECTS OF CONSCIOUSNESS |
| of self-confrontation is somehow off. Then the person needs guidance to get on the right track. QUESTION | 115 PERCEPTION, DETERMINATION, LOVE AS ASPECTS OF CONSCIOUSNESS |
| true deep feelings vanishes, the psyche no longer needs to produce falsely positive feelings. Such fear is | 115 PERCEPTION, DETERMINATION, LOVE AS ASPECTS OF CONSCIOUSNESS |
| been clogged up before. No form of self-expression needs to suffer at the expense of those forms | 116 REACHING THE SPIRITUAL CENTER-STRUGGLE BETWEEN LOWER SELF AND SUPERIMPOSED CONSCIENCE |
| You may be as ashamed of very legitimate needs as you are of faults, or of assets | 117 SHAME: A LEGACY OF CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES, EVEN FAVORABLE ONES |
| non-eternal. They come into being because of the needs of a particular civilization and remain because of | 117 SHAME: A LEGACY OF CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES, EVEN FAVORABLE ONES |
| limited ability to grasp eternal values. The temporary needs are dictated by the conditions of a specific | 117 SHAME: A LEGACY OF CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES, EVEN FAVORABLE ONES |
| individual will use the pleasure drive for other needs -- for example, to enhance the ego, to | 119 MOVEMENT, CONSCIOUSNESS, EXPERIENCE: PLEASURE, THE ESSENCE OF LIFE |
| in history, humankind became more aware of the needs of others. Here, too, it was first a | 120 THE INDIVIDUAL AND HUMANITY |
| is, displacement, substitution, and superimposition of feelings and needs. This topic deserves careful scrutiny and understanding, particularly | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |
| it is an absolute sign that some emotional needs or specific feelings have been shifted into different | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |
| a full rich life expresses a variety of needs and feelings -- not just a few. The | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |
| a person is, the less do the various needs interfere with one another and the less friction | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |
| the need for sexual and creative expression; the needs for self-assertion and for flexible adjustment; the needs | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |
| needs for self-assertion and for flexible adjustment; the needs for ego-gratification and for unselfishness. These, and many | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |
| for unselfishness. These, and many other apparently contradictory needs and self-expressions, can harmoniously live side by side | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |
| aware of what may seem like two contradictory needs and to realize that they are not necessarily | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |
| for sex is denied and superimposed with substitute needs. Feeling erroneously guilty about the natural need to | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |
| one's creative abilities hardly leaves room for other needs to be expressed, regardless of how constructive such | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |
| in you which is so harmful. Shifting original needs into different channels may take various forms, apart | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |
| and seclusion may be the manifestation of displaced needs in any of the aforementioned respects: fear of | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |
| is the result of ignoring that all these needs, and more, are in healthy interaction, natural and | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |
| utmost importance, my friends, to ascertain all your needs -- to what extent they are fulfilled, to | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |
| extent unfulfilled. Think about the variety of universal needs, and then see if you have given them | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |
| them all a rightful place. Ascertain which particular needs cause you to feel guilty and ashamed. Ascertain | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |
| you to feel guilty and ashamed. Ascertain which needs must remain unfulfilled due to your personal images | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |
| your personal displacements. How have you displaced your needs -- by substituting the opposite or shifting the | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |
| outer -- are equally unsatisfying. What possible real needs are at the bottom of such a nucleus | 121 DISPLACEMENT, SUBSTITUTION, SUPERIMPOSITION |